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Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything
(Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)

In which I will probably offend just about everybody...

First up: You will have to understand and accept that I AM GOD. The Bible tells me so. If you don't, then you are still a seeker and you haven't reached the 7th level yet. Don't worry, the chances are that you might get there. I have been through it all from accepting Jesus into my heart, to baptism in water and the holy spirit, speaking in tongues - the whole nine yards.

Now for some 'guidelines' - otherwise known as 'rules' for the folk needing authority in their routine...

If you are a follower of the Techno-Mystic JK you need to realise he is no JC. He is a false Messiah and his Bosun Higgs enriched Kool Aid will not help you achieve Nirvana through his Patreon site. JK is not 7th level material yet. For those who have no idea who I'm talking about, don't worry about it - hang about on social media health and nutrition groups long enough and you are bound to come across him.
The sun doesn't cause cancer - it prevents it.
Modern diseases are not caused by ancient foods.
Fat people are undernourished. They are not getting the nutrients they need from the foods they eat. They are having to eat more of those foods in an attempt to get what they need - this will cause them to overeat and inflammation and weight gain will be among the results.
Sorry vegans, you are not part of the solution - you are part of the problem. Your foods do not provide you with an environmentally efficient supply of your essential nutrients. Lierre Keith, a vegan of 20 years, destroyed her health and then wrote a book after finding she had been going down the wrong path.
Modern medicine is not curing disease - it is simply putting a band-aid on the symptoms - usually worsening the condition by blocking your natural defences from doing their job.
Climate scientists have not realised that we didn't perish in the last period of warming, or the one before that, or the one before that... (we didn't even perish in the glacial periods - which were perishingly cold!)
Gun control people: Get over it. The police are not going to save you from disaster. You need to wake up and take responsibility for your own defence. In the meantime, don't try and stop other people from defending themselves.
Politics: Grow up, understand that you are your own boss and take control of your own life - try to help somebody along the way. If we have to have government - let it be the sort that actually looks after the interests of society as a whole, not the self-serving rich pricks who have become fat off the poor.

I expect that I will expand on the above and put subheadings etcetera as I feel inspired. I don't feel that I've quite achieved the aim of offending everybody yet.